Nine of Wands-Tarot- The Staircase Read online

  “Yeah,” he said, meeting his gaze. “You want to ride the staircase? I know how to make it go really fast, but don’t tell my father. It’s only supposed to go that fast in emergencies.”

  “What if we break it?” Tristan asked, his eyes wide, but he was intrigued all the same.

  “We won’t break it,” Trinity told him. “Come on, let’s go.”

  They ran then to the top of that staircase, Tristan right on Trinity’s heels. Trinity fooled around with something and the staircase began to move faster and faster, the surface vibrating over the bumpy rocks. “Oh God, Trinity,” Tristan called out, trying to be heard above the rumble, “it’s going to break. It’s going to break!”

  “Hurry up,” Trinity called out, “hop on. Come on.” He held out his hand, and Tristan grabbed it. He would have gone anywhere with him, anywhere.

  They were laughing like two fools, clutching onto each other and the side rail, trying not to slip further and further down the mountain. Trinity was making his feet go faster and faster and Tristan was stumbling all over the place. At one point, he almost went plummeting over the railing. Trinity caught him by the shirt collar and pulled him back up against him. Tristan was breathing hard, partly from fear and partly from a feeling he wouldn’t quite understand for another year or so. “I won’t let you fall,” he said. “I won’t let you fall, Tristan.”

  * * * *

  Tristan swallowed. “Trinity,” he moaned, then felt someone shaking him awake.

  “Tristan, Tristan.” It was Samuel.

  Tristan looked up into his eyes for a minute, then realised that he was dreaming. He sat up. “Where’s Lana, the baby?” He spotted Bobby scattering the vestiges of their campfire.

  “Over there by that little waterfall, washing. Who’s Trinity?”

  “No one,” Tristan said, jumping to his feet. He could do with a wash himself. As he walked towards the gurgling sounds of rushing water, his gaze strayed over to a piece of guard rail which still clung to the rocky surface. It was cracked and crumbling, but it was still there, refusing to be washed away by the elements. He tore his gaze away and called out to Lana. “You decent?”

  “Sure. I’m washing the baby,” Lana replied.

  Tristan came around the rock and began to strip off his clothes. He had long done away with modesty. He threw his clothes aside and stepped into the water. It only came to his knees but the current was strong and the water surprisingly warm. He sat down in this, leaning back his head, lowering his head now to wash his long hair which had come completely loose. Heaven only knew what had happened to that string he had which held it back. He rubbed at his face. He had about two days of stubble. He needed a shave.

  “You want to know something?” Lana sat, wrapping up the baby again in Tristan’s battered jacket.

  “Do I?” Tristan asked her, lifting his dripping hair out of the water.

  She cocked her head. “Yeah, underneath all that, you are one good looking man.”

  Tristan laughed out loud. He’d never thought about himself like that. He hadn’t even wondered it in years…not since…well, that didn’t matter anymore. Was he good looking? He hadn’t seen himself in a mirror for what seemed like forever.

  Lana reached into his bag and pulled out a hand mirror. She leaned over and handed it to him.

  “What am I supposed to do with that?” He indicated the mirror.

  “Look at yourself. Really look at yourself.”

  He felt foolish even as he lifted the mirror up in front of his face. Dark eyes gazed back at him, sad and serious. His long brown hair plastered itself to his head. His jaw was rather square, his cheeks high, mouth full. He had a slight dimple in his left lower cheek. My God. He didn’t look the same. Somewhere over the course of these wartorn years, he had left that boy behind and became this man looking at him in the mirror.

  He handed it back to her. “If you were cleaned up, had a good shave, you’d be a dream.” She put the mirror back in her bag.

  He stood up now, feeling refreshed. He walked back to his kit and took out a piece of dirty towel he carried around with him. He dried off the best he could, then carried it back down to the waterfall and dipped it a few times in the water. He threw his clothes in too, spreading them out to dry on the rock while he wrapped his moth-eaten blanket around his waist. “I was beginning to reek. My clothes too,” he explained unnecessarily.

  Lana nodded, letting the baby clutch her finger. “I wonder what her name is. Should we give her a name, Tristan?”

  “Sure,” he said.

  “What was your mother’s name?”

  Tristan took a breath. The last time he had seen his mother, they had had words. In spite of everything, she still stood up for his father, right up to the bitter end. “Don’t name her after my mother,” he said.

  “I’m sorry. I didn’t realise that you…”

  “She trusted my father and he betrayed us all. Even when the war began,” Tristan said, “I knew there was more to it than just a disagreement over rules. Suddenly the restrictions they put on each other didn’t make sense. It was almost… personal.”

  “Did you ever find out what it was?”

  “No,” Tristan shook his head.

  “Your mother died in the…?”

  “Yes,” he said. “As far as I know, my father died outside on the terrace. She was in bed.”

  “My family was shopping.” Lana glanced upward. “Tristan?”

  “Yeah?”

  “Are there really survivors up there?”

  “I don’t know.”

  “Maybe we should turn back.”

  “To what?”

  “We could go to the camps and…” She paused, looking at the baby. “I love this child.”

  Tristan nodded. “Take Bobby and go then.”

  “Bobby?”

  “He loves you,” Tristan whispered.

  “Love?”

  “Please, even if it’s not true. Just pretend. Do it for me.”

  Lana moved closer to where Tristan sat on the rock. She pressed her forehead against his for a second. “You are the bravest, most determined man I’ve ever seen. You don’t know what you’ve done for…”

  Tristan moved his head away. “Go on, Lana. Take the child and Bobby and go back to the camp. Try to make a life there together. It’s the greatest vengeance. The truth is,” he looked up at the sky, “we are all finished. The Herits, the Celest. It is the end of two peoples who have lived together throughout the ages. We have destroyed each other, and now the Epemo are here, and they will wipe out what remains of us.”

  “We can rebuild. We can…”

  He shook his head. “It’s over,” he said. “My father and the Emperor threw thousands of years of history away over something that probably I will never know the answer to. Make what life you can with that child and Bobby, and if there is a way off this God- forsaken planet, then take it. Go before the Epemo take over. They are not tolerant to difference.”

  Lana picked up the baby. “Bobby won’t leave you. You’re his hero.”

  “He will if I order him to go. I’m still the platoon leader.”

  “What about you and Samuel? Is there a chance that…?”

  “There is no Samuel and I, Lana. Neither of us have anything left to give. But you do, that baby has brought it back to the surface. I’ve seen it in Bobby too. Please, go.”

  “You’ll die up there, you and Samuel. You’ll…” Lana looked as if she might cry.

  “That’s okay,” Tristan said softly. “It really is.”

  “But what if there is no one, Tristan,” she said. “What if…?”

  “I have to do this. I’m not sure why. I just have to know.” He needed to reach the top of that summit one last time, then, whatever happened, happened.

  Chapter Two

  Tristan and Samuel stood there watching as Bobby and Lana descended the mountain path with the baby. “You manipulated that situation,” Samuel said out of the corner of his mout
h without looking at him. He waited for a response. There was none. “You and I both know that she didn’t need Bobby to get back to the camp. Lana is tough as nails. She could have gone…”

  “He wouldn’t have gone,” Tristan interrupted suddenly, “if I hadn’t told him she needed his protection. It was a matter of pride.”

  “What I don’t understand is, why?” Samuel looked directly at him now. “Why did you do it?”

  “They love each other.” He shrugged. “And that baby needs someone to…” he stopped. He’d said enough now.

  “Love.” Samuel looked stunned. “What would you know about love?”

  Tristan swallowed. “Come on. Let’s get going.”

  He had given Samuel the opportunity to leave as well, but he’d refused. As they began to climb again, Tristan paused. He had to try once more. “You do realise you’re going to die up there with me.”

  “Yeah,” he said quietly. That was all he said. He didn’t say anything else.

  They continued up the laborious mountain path. It was hours before they found a ledge wide enough for them to rest. They were both exhausted, their hands bruised and bloodied from scraping against the sharp rocks.

  “I don’t hear anything,” Samuel told Tristan, glancing at him from where he leaned against the rock. He handed him some horrible energy bar that they’d found a few days back on some of the dead. “Do you think the Epemo have already…?”

  “No.” Tristan unwrapped the bar. “Do you remember all those spacecraft we saw in the sky a few nights back?”

  “Yeah.”

  “They were Celest space craft heading away from the Ridge. My guess is they’re fighting somewhere else, trying to keep the Epemo at bay.”

  “But they’ve already been here, the Epemo.”

  “Yes, and we saw some evidence of downed spacecraft. The Celest got them. I doubt the Epemo would send in too many at a time, especially since they don’t know how many Celest remain. The Epemo won’t underestimate their enemy. Don’t forget the Celest are warriors by nature. Remember all the obligatory training?”

  “Yeah. I used to think that was pretty weird, given they weren’t at war with anyone. Well, back then anyway. Maybe they were planning to attack us all along.”

  Tristan bit into the energy bar, without commenting. It was bitter, probably spoilt. He swallowed, trying not to taste it.

  “So you think we’ll find Celest, rather than Epemo, up there?”

  “Doesn’t make much difference either way who’s up there, does it?”

  Samuel shook his head. “How many more days until the top?”

  “At least five or six, depending. It looks like we’re in for a storm. We need to find shelter fast. If I recall, it’s another hour or so to that point up there.” He pointed above them. “And there’s a cave.”

  “Good thing you know this path so well. I don’t think I ever went up there once, even when the staircase was built.”

  “Due to my father’s position as head of the Herits government, I had no choice really but to attend social functions at the emperors home.”

  “It must have been boring for you.”

  Tristan squared his jaw. “I think we need to get moving if we’re going to get inside before the rains.”

  Samuel agreed and they began to climb once again.

  * * * *

  The rain was coming down hard now. It was making the path muddy and hard to traverse. The rocks were slippery also and several times, he slipped and almost went tumbling down the mountain. By the time they had gotten to the cave, Samuel was swearing. “My gun is soaked. I’m soaked.”

  “Take off your clothes. I’ll make a fire,” Tristan said.

  A few minutes later they were both naked, huddled together under that old ratty blanket of his, and shivering to get warm. Tristan finished the stale energy bar and drank a bit of the water.

  “Are we going to be able to get up there? What about when we have to go straight up, use the rope? What if it’s too slippery to…?”

  “It’s going to slow us up.”

  “Do you know where the camp is, if it even exists?”

  “There is an open field on the left side of the Ridge to the North. It’s possible that they…”

  “Tristan, you realise that this may all be in your head. Maybe there’s no camp, no survivors and…”

  He sucked in some breath.

  “Tristan.” Samuel met his gaze. “What’s the real reason we’re going up to Celestial Ridge? We can’t kill them all.”

  “You’re welcome to leave,” Tristan said.

  “I didn’t say I was leaving but fuck, Tristan, I understood your motivation over the last few years. I knew what we were doing and why, but now…I’m not so sure anymore. Why don’t we go back home, join the survivors, start again and…”

  “Samuel, there’s no starting again. We’re destined to be ruled, or exterminated by the Epemo. My guess is the latter. It’s only a matter of time.”

  “Then why did you send Lana and…?”

  “To let them enjoy the time that remains.”

  “Why don’t we…?” Samuel paused. “You want to die up there. Why?”

  “I don’t want to die. I want to…”

  “Rescue survivors that you say don’t have a chance in hell anyway, not in the long run.”

  “Fuck, Samuel, stop analyzing everything to death.” He took the blanket off, and stood up. He was putting on his still damp pants when Samuel said, “I refuse to give up hope. That baby was a sign.”

  “We’ll hold on as long as we can, steal every moment.”

  He started suddenly when he felt Samuel come up behind him and wrap his arms around him. “I’ll stay with you until the end, Tristan. You know that.”

  Tristan accepted the embrace, then, quietly stepped away from him. Samuel went to get his own blanket out of his bag, and curled up beside the fire. Tristan wrapped himself up in his, and sat with his back against the wall of the cave watching the flames dance in the fire. What do you know about love? Those words echoed in his mind. He closed his eyes, bringing his feet up underneath him. What did he know about love? Too much, too damn much.

  * * * *

  Trinity got in big trouble over the staircase. It broke down and had to be repaired, and his father had a freak-out. Trinity never told anyone that Tristan had been there with him that night. When Tristan saw Trinity again a few weeks later, he asked him why he hadn’t ratted him out. “I’m the one who got you involved,” Trinity smirked at him. “You would have never done it on your own.”

  “Are you saying I don’t have guts?” Tristan’s chin went up. He didn’t want Trinity to think he was a wimp.

  “Do you?” he baited.

  “Yeah. Dare me to do anything.”

  “Okay, come cave exploring with me later, when it gets dark”

  His parents had come up to the Ridge for a birthday celebration for Trinity’s mother. They would be staying the weekend. “We’re not allowed out after…”

  “See,” Trinity cocked an eyebrow. “You’re a rule follower. You’d have to sneak out, and then,” he paused and lowered his voice, “we’d have to ride the stairs and hop over midway to get to this neat cave I know. There’s all kinds of creepy animals and monsters in there.”

  “There is not,” Tristan replied.

  “You’ll see, if you dare.” Trinity made a face at him.

  Later that night, they had snuck out. Tristan had practically broken his neck hoping off the staircase to get to that cave. This cave, the very cave he was sitting in. Around him the fire crackled and he was filled with memory. He could almost see them, frolicking in this cave. Trinity had tried to scare him, making sounds like monsters, and animals. He had held his ground, refusing to show his fear. In the end, Trinity seemed impressed. As they made their way back to the staircase, he had stopped and said, “You know, you’re okay, Tristan.”

  He had felt like a king at that moment. As the time went by, they spent m
ore and more time together. He would come and watch Trinity train. Trinity would invite him to come up on the weekends sometimes and they would lay in the grass in the field and try and imagine what lay beyond the clouds. He guessed he was in love with Trinity the moment he saw him, and as the months then years went by, it became almost painful when they were apart. He had no idea that Trinity was feeling the same way until the night of Trinity’s nineteenth birthday. Tristan couldn’t wait to give him his present, a handmade bust of their two heads. Now that he thought about it, it wasn’t a very good likeness of either of them, but he had spent weeks working on it, and he was sure that Trinity would love it.

  He could see himself sitting at that table. His father had been absent. In fact, he had been absent from a great many functions over those few months. At the time, Tristan had no idea that their relationship was deteriorating. He was far too focused on Trinity. There were a lot of people at the party, and he was just a little more than jealous that Trinity hadn’t paid very much attention to him. He seemed far too occupied dancing with girls. Tristan watched him broodingly from the corner, turning down offers to dance. He had waited to give him his gift. It was private and he didn’t want anyone to see.

  The anger inside that eighteen year old grew throughout the evening, and then exploded. As soon as he blew up at Trinity, he regretted it. He threw the present at him, and watched as it shattered on the floor. Embarrassed, he ran out of the Emperor’s grand home and down to the staircase, wanting only to get away.

  He didn’t know Trinity was behind him until he felt his arms creep around him from behind. He tried to struggle away from him, but Trinity held him fast. “Calm down, Trist,” he said. “What’s up with you?”

  “Nothing. Leave me alone. Go and dance with your girls!”

  “Ah, so that’s it,” he said softly.

  Having his arms around him like that was beginning to make him feel strange. “Let me…leave me alone!”

  “Let’s go to our cave, okay?” His lips were moving next to his ear, practically caressing it. There were shivers running up and down his spine. He felt it straight down to his cock, and he was embarrassed. He wiggled out of his grasp. “What about those girls you were…?”